This is a list sent in by a nameless jotter. It is by no means exhaustive. It had no notes but each well worn phrase has been used as banter- a rejoinder or an amusing interruption in a conversation or during an anecdote or monologue. Almost all use irony, sarcasm or mild mockery and are cliches – but they could possibly still incite mirth if the timing was right. Thumping cliches have asterisks. I’ll get my coat.
I am now off on a bike to the Bodleian to consult Partridge’s 1977 Dictionary of Catch Phrases in manuscript (as you do). It will be interesting to see how many of these he recorded. Most are site specific but fairly obviously so – for example if someone is going on about a politician – how he should be incarcerated, hung drawn and quartered etc., you might say “tell us how you really feel..”
Amen to that!
And this affects me how?
And you know this it how?
Are you nuts?
As it were (after an unintended pun)
As the Bishop said to the actress (archaic)
As you do
*Back to the drawing board
*Been there, Done that, Got the T-shirt
Bless!
Bravo!
Busted!
*Cut to the chase
Do what?
*Do I look like etc.,?
Don’t be like that
*Don’t even go there
*Don’t even think about it
Don’t get me started
Don’t hold back
Don’t you hate it when that happens?
Dream on
First world problem (after someone says something self-indulgent -like there is not enough foam in their latte)
Get on with it
Get (the fuck) out of here
Good luck with that (similar to ‘In your dreams’)
Have you quite finished?
Here we go (said with a resigned tone)
Hey that’s my line!
How very dare you!
*I can live with that
*I feel your pain
I’ll get my coat (British)
I guess you had to be there
I have a question
I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that
I’m not saying anything (nothing)
I hear what you’re saying
I think I love you
I think I’m going to cry (be sick)
In English, please
*In your dreams
Is that it?
*Is nothing sacred?
Is someone writing this down?
Is there a point to this?
Is this a five minute argument, or the full half-hour? (Monty Python)
Just like that! (a Tommy Cooperism)
Just saying
Music to my ears
My heart bleeds for you
Next!
Nina, Nina, Nina
Not to beat about the bush (archaic)
Not on my watch
Not that there is anything wrong with that
Now I’ve heard it all
Now you tell me
Or not
Or words to that effect
Pass me the sick bag
Respect!
Shame!
So I am lead to believe
So they tell me
Spare me the details
Steady on!
Take a deep breath
Talk to the hand, the face ain’t listening…
*Tell it like it is
Tell me about it
Tell that to the marines
Tell us what you really think
*Thanks for sharing
Thank you for putting that image in my mind
*That went well
That’s all she wrote
There is a God!
To hell with you (and the horse you rode in on)
*Too much information
Well I never
We’ve all been there
What are you like?
What’s that all about?
Where’s the fun in that?
You cannot be serious (said like John McEnroe)
You can’t make this stuff up
You had me worried there
You just don’t get it
You may say that…
*You say that like it’s a bad thing
You monster! (a Charle Brookerism)
*You need to get out more
You had me at “nameless jotter.”